All I want for Christmas is some brand spanking new confidence.

just in case and i told you so

I like my sister. I like how she approaches me with a simple, 'hey do you want to catch some breakfast?', which ends up to be a labouriously long breakfast conversation about life and all the so-called hardships we face. And perhaps, it was I who brought up the conversation... I who needed advice and it so happened, she had the right type of wisdom to impart at that particular moment. Although, I have to say that I still felt somewhat ambushed as she spoke to my feelings.

I stuttered and stumbled, as I tried to explain to position of us Gen-Y-ers. How we needed the space and the time to find ourselves and should not have to deal with the pressure from our parents to find the perfect job or get rich and successful or at least have a plan or something... pronto. It is true, that we have the privilege and the right to find ourselves while we can. But she said in a very matter-of-fact tone, that privilege will not last forever. And that is a fact you cannot change.

Not all of us are trust fund kids. Although the few that are.... well, good for you. That privilege will not last forever - I guess this is the reason why we do what we have to do, even at this moment, even if we don't want to. Knowing that it can be stripped away from you, that is kind of like a sucker punch line.

That is why we have plans, however vague they seem. Because even the most carefree or free-spirited person will need a plan for just in case moments. An experienced skydiver will still need to put on his second set of parachutes. Because when that moment comes and you are unprepared, well that's really an i told you so moment.

Melb is where my stomach is

Melbourne is a small city with a big heart. Only in Melbourne will you find 5-star food within walking distance and at reasonable prices. Today, I followed the boyfriend and his sister to a place which apparently served terrific Sichuan cuisine. We were walking along Lonsdale and I was about to ask exactly how we were going to get to this place, when both of them somehow magically disappeared into this teensy alley way. It was exactly like in those movies filmed in New York, where there’s a tiny opening between two buildings and you somehow squeeze your way through it. Except instead of getting stuck, you find yourself right at the doorsteps of the Dainty Sichuan (renamed Sichuan House).

If you want to know what it’s like to be an advanced economy not feeling the pinch of the GFC, you just have to step into the Dainty Sichuan to get a feel of what I am talking about. Round table after round table was heavily laden with spicy food. The place was literally a mumbo jumbo of faces. Very cool to see grown Australian men decorated in tattoos , sweating over a dish of spicy Cumin pork ribs and sliced fish in chilli oil soup. =D

The food was sublimely covered in chilli and spices, did I mention? Every inch of it. Of course I bit into those annoying little ‘ma lat’ peppers every now and then, but it was worth it. Forget Anthony Bourdain, this place is AP-approved (so full of myself). But seriously, Bourdain came and went in 2009 and he said he really could not get enough of the food here.

So 2 more days in Melbourne and it is back to reality. Probably 2 full kilos heavier as well. Funny, because I bought extra baggage space and have not thought about what to do with it. Guess I know what it can be used for. To store extra fat!!!

When i'm kissing you it all makes perfect sense

I think I've been disappointed twice this year because I didn't get to make that trip to Melbourne when they told me I could. Vested interest for me to make that trip. Sure, the purpose of going there is to help defend the rights of the dead. Yet who wouldn't want a free ticket to Melbourne right?

I miss Il Fredo's and Chongqing hotpot. But most of all, I haven't see the boy for close to half a year already.

While eating Gelato and Chong Qing hotpot, you must be accompanied by a few of your most favourite people in the world and of course, people who love chilly as much as you do. If not, those dinner outings will surely have a big 'FAIL' sign stamped across it.

The year has been a blur of ups and downs. I got to know some crazy people. But while social life has been taking off for the most part (because believe it or not, some personality test called me an introvert), work took a turn for the worst after I came back from the training program.

What was supposed to be 6-months of pure bliss was cut short to 3 months.

It felt good to have your bosses feel as if they need you back. But the novelty wore off after 2 weeks, and I went back to feeling incompetent and unimportant in the major scheme of things.

And then you have people telling you that you deserve much more. That sparked a whole internal conflict in my mind. Then I thought, I'll just hang in here for awhile and see what else this road has to offer me before I do anything rash. Like quit my job and open a cafe while moonlighting as an event pianist. So not going to happen, I know. Even i'm pretty realistic when it comes to setting a goal.

It was good to get away from the city over Merdeka weekend though. Took a slow drive down to Chilling Waterfalls at KKB. We actually found the sign to Chillings earlier but decided to travel further. Only to realize that that was the correct sign when we were only 8 km away from Frasers.

Last minute day-trippers, L to R: Sheair, Peng, Su, J and Mel. We decided to go the day before. I guess all of us needed some sort of break.

That wraps it up for now. Hopefully in the time between this post and the next, someone would have offered me a ticket to Melbourne.

Financial literacy is something else that we need

I received a very encouraging email today with the subject title 'what I do at work everyday'.

The email contained the link below and that was all it said.

http://curiouscapitalist.blogs.time.com/2010/08/10/escaping-the-middle-income-trap/?xid=rss-topstories

The article highlights the dilemma the Malaysian economy currently faces: the middle-income trap. The CC explains in simple terms how most economies find it easier to jump from low-income to middle-income stage than it is to make the leap from middle to high-income. The rationale behind this is that you can use your poverty to your advantage. Cheap wages make it possible for a low-income country to be competitive in labour intensive sectors (such as manufacturing) and produce cheap goods for export etc

In short, when you are middle-income, you lose that competitiveness (in Malaysia's case, to countries such as Cambodia, Vietnam and China).

The CC then goes on to provide a couple of suggestions about how Malaysia can break through this middle-income barrier. I don't refute his comments, I totally agree for example:

i) that the government has at least recognised what Malaysia needs and has aptly appointed the NEAC to come up with the NEM. But really, everyone is anticipating the details of the NEM due to be released in October together with the Budget.

ii) I also agree that the Government initiatives are not sufficient to lift the Malaysian economy higher. And that businesses should be willing to take the risks.. be more involved in entrepreneurship and R&D.

On the second point, I would like to highlight why I was encouraged by this email. This friend of mine has no formal background in Economics and hates Math. And yet she took the time to read an article like this on Time Magazine. She may not know it, but her action of reading this article has contributed in a small manner to the cause of lifting Malaysia out of the middle-income trap. How many Malaysians actually care about the inner workings of the economy although it inevitably affects their standard of living?

Imagine if 10% of Malaysians knew what was going on. That's 2.7 million people who would question how come our economy works out to be the way it is. That's also 2.7 million that would strive in their own ways to change the mindset and carve out a new path for Malaysia.

Ask yourself the following question: Why would a budding and simple businessman (i'm not talking about Urbanites) take the risk of entrepreneurship if readily available gains can be made by contracting or becoming the middle-man for MNCs or even a medium/bigger enterprise?

He wouldn't. Not unless he's in an extremely dire situation (in which case he much rather be selling fish). But there's an alternative, financial education. If you told him that the risks were likely to be much higher, but the returns he'd be able to make would be three or fourfold, you've essentially planted in him an idea. Imagine if you told this story to 10000 budding businessmen. Even if only 100 bought your story, that's enough to get things started.

Digging deeper, financial education may seem like a really simple suggestion to a gargantuan problem. Much simpler than say for example, revamping our whole education system. While I agree the latter is a much-needed move, I'm afraid that the Malaysian economy cannot wait for the latter to occur in order to be high income. My suggestion is to go to people that matter, and start educating them about our economy and the opportunities that are available. Even the simplest concepts matter like the following:

The fact that there is a Government organisation called the Small and Medium Enterprise Corporation which will provide not only the funding to start up your business, but training as well as entrepreneurial opportunities.

One of the problems with SME Corp is that it receives so little publicity that SO FEW know about it. A 21 yr old who wanted to start a revolutionary business but had no capital would be denied this opportunity just because he did not know this initiative existed. Denied opportunity not only for him, but for Malaysia. Who knows what could have become of his idea?

I once asked my senior, a much respected economist in the Bank, how we could escape this trap. He replied very simply, talk...talk amongst your friends. Discuss relevant issues in informal settings.. Things that will make you think and question and maybe generate an idea. There's only so many LV bags you can talk about or Grey's anatomy series (quoting a PWC ex-employee).

It's true that economists may be by and large, 'all words and no action'. But perhaps an economist's words may provide direction for you, the economic agent, to take action.

What's going on?

I feel like I've done so much but have accomplished nothing in the past 6 months. I feel bolder and more confident but lately, I have this fear that part of me is slipping away. And just like everything I do, I'm scared that this new found confidence will just be another phase in life.

Yesterday, I trudged on thorny plants and creepy crawlies, pushed away leaves to prevent them from scratching my eyes, climbed across fallen tree trunks and hung on to tree vines and roots to keep myself from tumbling down a hill. I didn't really know why I was doing it. At that point though, all I knew was that we were headed towards a cleaner, more pristine waterfall. Or at least that's what our 'waterfall' tour guide told us.

When we got there, the others happily headed for the plunge albeit freezing cold waters. I loaded up on water, climbed to the biggest bestest rock, parked my huge ass on the rock, and soaked in the sun.

I do things in search for a better outcome or at least according to the promise of a better return.
I realise that whenever I agree to go on the thrill ride, the ending may or may not turn out to be as expected but that's not the point. I've reached a point in life where I think I want change but I'm not ready for it. It's like reaching this beautiful waterfall and not wanting to have a dip in it. And in the end, I sat on the rock wondering what on earth I was doing there. That was when I knew that I was brave enough for the challenge, but not equipped enough to do it.